Forgive

Forgiveness   4/20/07

I am used to your methodical ways.
I am well aware of your supposed perfection.
I was your supporter as a child.

Children are like puppies...
unconditional love.
Questions of your behavior erupted
much later...when reason and experience
collided.

How do you make a robot feel?
How does a machine experience emotion?
My original hero fell a great fall.
My sacred bubble of comfort burst.

I was alone and floundering in a world
I was not ready for.
Pieces of me fell back together after years
of guilt, hurt, and realization.

Color me surprised when we talk again.
I am a different person now.
I doubt the same of you...
Liars are good actors...

I want to believe your turn around.
But the past jabs me in the throat and
refuses to let go until I gain my senses.

Forgive and forget is a wonderful myth...
Change does not come overnight.
You've scarred your family worse then you
can comprehend.

Sometimes being around you feels
like being slapped in the face.
It makes you win. Time made
a difference....but not that much.

I made a vow to myself to let
the past go. Concentrate on the
future...the only thing I can control.
The only way to move ahead is
to let the past go.

You taught me that...in a bizarre way
I thank you.
Where do we go from here? Where do we go?